Who are the ladyboy scammers

If you’ve been into the business of looking for a ladyboy girlfriend online, you for sure happened to meet a couple of unpleasant girls, or girls whose real goal was hidden. Maybe it costed you money already, or worse, it costed you to be left heartbroken. At least, it costed you a precious time that you couldn’t allocate to the good girls. You must be conscious that online scamming has never been more developed than nowadays, and it’s sad, but the easiest way to scam you is by playing with your feelings. There are many types of scams, and many types of scammers, and many types of girls that look like scams but are not really… Pretty complicated, right? Let’s have a dive into it.

Who are the ladyboy scammers

Let’s address the 500 pounds gorilla in the room; most of the scams come from the poorest countries, and since we’re talking about ladyboys, let’s say that most of the scams you will encounter will come from South-East Asia, and sad but true, the most will come from Philippines (ah, the beautiful country where I live with my sweet ladyboy girlfriend! No need to generalise either!). Why Philippines more than Thailand or Malaysia, or Indonesia? For the simple reason that Filipinos are the best in South-East Asia at speaking english, and that you are probably dating girls online in english even if it’s not your native language. Of course it’s bad to generalise, there are fortunately of course more honest people in that world than the opposite.

There is only one reason why these people do it: easy money. In the Philippines, the average salary is around 200 USD, and you have to work hard to get them. I understand that some people find it better to sit on their morality (although they’re the most catholic country in the world) and scam foreigners for whom 200 USD does maybe not represent a 10th of their salary. Some scammers really don’t have the choice, either they do it or they die, and it’s still better than being a prostitute (not sure though, at least with a prostitute you get what you pay for).

Actually, ladyboy or real girl, it doesn’t matter. A scammer is a scammer, and the process is the same. Actually, most of the ladyboy scammers will just pass for real girls, and it’s really hard to tell when the only thing you use is an Instant Messaging software and a webcam. Some scammers sometimes are straight boys who crossdress just for “business” but are not real ladyboys, and are not even attracted to men. Sometimes, they will openly admit their status of ladyboy, which is a good strategy in my humble opinion, because it’s a powerful fantasy for many men, and can make the scam more profitable in some cases.

Different scams, different scammers

I believe the most common scam follows that pattern. You meet a girl online, you chat for a bit, she is charming and you both fall in love for each other. Then for a pretext or another, you start sending her money (either she asked for it, or she STRONGLY suggested it), and you think it’s okay because she is giving you hope for a serious relationship later. Common pretexts will be the following:

  • she needs to pay for her internet access or she needs to buy a new laptop (or “rent a laptop”, yeah I’ve heard that one, don’t be a fool, nobody rents a laptop, nowhere)
  • she needs money for health care (either for her or for a member of her family)
  • she needs money to pay for a hypothetic visa to come to your country to visit you (99% of the people in South East Asia will never ever get granted a tourist visa for a first world country, and they know it)

And the list goes on and on… In all the cases, either she is asking you amounts that are always bigger than what it really costs (how can you know, it’s in a country that’s so much different from yours), either she never has the intention to use your money for that purpose, or she is simply giving the same show to many foreigners at the same time. Or the three things at the same time, most probably for the best scam artists. Be careful when the discussion starts to be about money, it’s always an alert that she might not be who you think she is. Oh and also, she might also have a boyfriend already in her country, in addition.

In the general case, you will never happen to meet the girl in real life. If you happen to travel to Asia and meet her, she will find a pretext and disappear. Don’t worry for her, she has many other cash cows on her hook. But in some cases, you might meet her. It actually happened to one of my closest friends. Chatting online, sending money, being serious, and finally he goes to Asia to meet his lovely girlfriend (been to the beach, restaurant, club, shopping… all expenditures were for him of course)… He had amazing time and came back to his country more in love than ever, to actually find out a couple of weeks later that she was doing the same thing with many other foreigners. No need to work when you can just have fun and make 5 times the average salary of your country.

Good news: all Asian ladyboys are not scammers

Reading this, you might think that all ladyboys in Asia are scammers. That is not true. For sure, an Asian ladyboy will be happy to have a foreigner boyfriend because it has higher chances to give her financial security, and a brighter future. It doesn’t mean she only wants to fool you. Most of the girls are serious and want to raise a family, even ladyboys. But they pay attention to the financial health of their potential partners, and that’s just normal, even western girls do that. Besides, money is far from being the only reason why Asian ladyboys like to have a foreign partner, and this is true and verified (by myself, amongst others). So of course you shouldn’t generalise, and I can assure you that Philippines is a great country with great people and great serious ladyboys (when you know how to pick the good ones).

If you want a deeper understanding, I have a chapter about ladyboy scammers, and the other types of girls that you should avoid when looking for a ladyboy girlfriend in my guide for finding a ladyboy girlfriendΒ (and so much more inside of course).

Have a doubt? Want to share experience?

If you have an Internet ladyboy girlfriend and you have a doubt that she might be just scamming you, you can drop me a comment or send me an email to ask me what I think about it. I have seen a lot and will probably spot most of the scammers by only reading some lines of your chatting logs.

And if you have experienced something similar, and you would like to share it on my blog, don’t hesitate to send me an email as well so that I could prepare an article for you and your testimonial. I always like to put sharing at the centre of the debate, gathering many different opinions and many different stories.Β I have been affected a lot in my past, I spent more money and time that I should have in my quest for happiness… Even if in the end I won and got the happy relationship I was looking for, I believe that you can avoid all of the troubles I’ve been through.Β Just read my blog, follow me on Facebook or Twitter, subscribe to my newsletter… Share this article. Comment it! And write me emails. Let’s share, share, share. And love, love, love.

French young man living in the Philippines with my ladyboy girlfriend. I wrote a book about my experience on dating trans women here https://howtodatealadyboy.com and I created the first decent dating site for trans women there https://myladyboydate.com

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18 thoughts on “Who are the ladyboy scammers

  1. Great post and great topic. Unfortunately, the ability to speak English, the cheap access to internet cafes, and the overwhelming poverty, are fertile ground for GG, TG, and male scammers to prey on the lonelyhearts of the world. It is unfortunate because for those in the western world who are attracted to transgendered individuals, the philippines is one of the best places to meet an emotionally, spiritually, and physically healthly girl. My advice is go there soon, and meet the girls face to face as soon as possible, then you can get a feeling for the person face to face, and meet several girls as friends initially without committing to anything beyond developing a friendship.


    • Very safe advice Randi, like you say, men should visit Philippines and see the country by their own eyes to fully understand where they are heading.

  2. Hi Simon! I`m so happy to know that you`re one of the guys who really appreciates transgender women . How I wish that I could also find a guy like you, care to give me some advice? I`ve been looking for so long for a lover yet I always fail. πŸ™ wishing you all the best, may you and your lover lasts long , take care and God bless

    Love Lots,
    Abee XO XO XO <3 :*

    • Yeah there are plenty of men like me, you know. First, I believe that looking for someone on all the pornish forums you can find online is not the right thing to do. I have never been part of one of these forums, I don’t like them, because all you can find is men willing to come to Thailand (or Philippines) to satisfy their fantasy and then go back to their country, that’s all. Moreover, these guys happen to be jerks.

      Facebook is the way to go for sure. Dating websites as well, but only the most serious ones. I bet you can find also valuable men on the ground (look for expats in places like Makati in Manila or Ayala Center/IT Park in Cebu).

      Ingat Abee πŸ˜‰

  3. Great article which sums up the problem with ladyboy scammers nicely.

    And I’ll also add that ladyboys are very popular, it’s just that not many men will admit it openly.

    I’ve built a free Asian dating site called AsianLoveConnections.com and I’ve actually added a ladyboy option for ladyboys to register as well! So no more wondering if you should use “male” or “female” like on other dating sites.

  4. I helped a guy whose house was supposedly washed away in the great 2011 CDO flood. Then he wanted to finish his schooling to become a teacher. But there were constant surprises and emergencies. Motorcycle accidents, family emergencies. This went on for about 9 months, until I demanded to see the university transcripts. After a lot of delays, he sent some transcripts that showed he had been studying years ago, and a document that showed he had recently signed up (to a different, cheaper, school than he had been telling me) but NOTHING showing he had actually been enrolled during the time I had been supporting him! Maybe he was spending all the money on Beer! Sorry, enrolling NOW isn’t good enough! So I said, “Bye, amigo”! Amping!

  5. Simon Deleaux
    Im really worried.
    Hi Simon,

    I love your websites & videos your are really helping me.

    So, I’m 21 Male from the UK. I’ve loved ladyboys since around 18. Like you I know normal women cannot satisfy me as much as ladyboys……

    I’ve met a 26 year old ladyboy who lives in Davao city. We met off a webcam site (Bad I know)

    She claims she loves me & has never had a serious relationship, we Skype and talk for hours each day. She has printed my photos and made an album.

    I’ve booked flights & hotel to see her in March (3 months) I’m worried as I’ve read about scammers……

    Here is some of our conversations:-

    im happy? yes i am . cause i have u and all ur words . im sad ? yes i am scott . cause its hard to wait for along time days for us to be able to meet together.Yes i understand and i need to understand for us to be able to meet in person. i am not asking riches life.i am not asking very wealthy life. im asking ur family acceptance im asking ur frnds resfect and not judge me. most of all i will ask god to guide and to teach us to be strong in everyday that were very far. whatever looks that we have whatever status life that we have remember scott mahal god alwAys a reason thats why we still part of this world right now.maybe now god allow us to meet in site.maybe this is the real life real words and start of our journey of our life together and this is the measurements of how strong we are how truely we are i know god have a good purpose why we both talk . always remember scott mahal . im forever urs faithfully .i love you.

    i surrender my heart and soul for you.i honestly yes and proud to say that ur the only one in my heart and mind.they all know here about u. i am stick to one. there is a lot of customer guest offer me good life. but scott in the name of god i tell u this .ur the person i choose to be with me forever. in a riches and poorest days i will stay with you forever. i type and cry mix emotion that i felt right now.3 months i will wait and i wish that god guide us in a better way.

    I really love her & feel shes the one.

    Do you think this is genuine?

    I need help I love her & don’t want to get hurt.

    • Hi Scott, thanks for your comment πŸ™‚ Well I cannot tell you from just a conversation if she is genuine or not…

      I known ladyboys who rip off foreign men for fun (well, for a living too).

      I know ladyboys who are just as decent as anybody else, just hoping to find a loving man who is not going to use them for some fantasy curiosity.

      It’s good already that you’re aware of romance scams, because some guys are not and that’s where it hurts bad. But don’t let these thoughts ruin your relationship either! Your girlfriend doesn’t want to be looked upon like she’s a bad person, especially if she’s not! Always give the benefit of the doubt, she is innocent until proven guilty.

      You’re going to Davao soon, you will have a great time, that’s all you need to know πŸ™‚ (march is summer time in Philippines). Take your time with your relationship, don’t rush plans of moving in, of relocating, of helping your girlfriend to finance a house or whatever.

    • could be really scary. simon’s right, sometimes you have to give the person the benefit of the doubt but there’s nothing else I can say but good luck and I hope you’re doing the right thing. xxx

    • lol I actually thought of making such a list, I was not sure about the legal framework of publicly giving names and photos though, so didn’t do it finally.

      I came across a dating site (for biological women) that had a “wall of shame” of all the scammers who operated on their site, I find the idea really good, thought maybe not 100% ok legally / morally speaking.

  6. I am from the uk. I met someone on the ladyboy site. We met in London. For just a few hours. We message vire whats app every day. She asked for money for breast enlargement. I against my better judgement sent money. We still messge. She claims to be coming to the uk. She works in Kuwait. It’s not grest information I know. I am very experienced. I on meeting thought she was very genuine. Psil

  7. Elmer Abo-Abo, of Tagbilaran city, Bohol, aka pretty_shemale_elmer, or Elmera, is operating scam #3 in the article above.
    I caught on when sie supposedly had hir phone confiscated, and I was supposed to call a landline at a store in Manila. I looked back in my old records, and it was the same number as hir house in Bohol. Then sie sent some obviously fake photos of hir at the manila airport, in front of the Embassy, etc. She had never left Bohol!
    I chewed hir out for it, and a few months later sie is asking again for money, with the same old excuses. Maybe sie is really a robot!

  8. Hi, great post, I will give you my experiences so far, I have been talking with a Thai ladyboy online for a few weeks now, she has many of the same interests as I do, nature, games, food etc.

    She has been honest that she worked at Nana plaza as a bar girl (I know what that entails) for 7 months but stopped now, bit of a concern as I’m not that type of person to visit such place. She told me she only did it for the money, for family ect. And never again.

    One concern is she posts regular photos on Instagram of expensive food or emailing me photos of pricey toys that she bought, I would think if her family had money trouble she would not be able to afford it, especially as its been 7 months since her work at Nana Plaza and currently has no job. She says she is going to to Phuket this month for a holiday also.

    I want this to be real but deep down seems off. We will Skype over the weekend, I’m going to help her with her English.

    She also tells me to come visit as soon as possible which I plan to in the coming months for other reasons (Brother lives in Vietnam) but as I met her online and get on well with her I can make an extra trip

    I could give you her Instagram name?, maybe you can find some clues hehe. Like detective work haha

    You could always email her and see if she likes you instantly, tells you to visit and then we know for sure.

    Lol I soud paranoid now. Bye the way I’m 28 and she is 23..

    Thanks maybe you can help me out and give some idea if this is real or a scam.


  9. More for Kiwi123;

    I am the guy who was fooled for a while by Elmer Abo-Abo.
    Here are more of my dumshit adventures.
    Laurence was supposedly a student at a local university, majoring in hotel science.
    She sent pics of her hanging out at her farm, in casual female clothes, and competing in a local womanless beauty contest, where she was second runnner-up (third place in beauty contest euphemisms)
    I was proud to know a young student, enjoyed knowing about her life and successes and sent money to help her with tuition etc.
    I also sent one balikbaying box. This is a big moving box you can send to the PI for $65. (Kiwi 123, I am not sure if they send them to Thailand.) Now, I have figured out what Balikbaying means in English. You have bought some nice gifts, and paid for the big moving box. so then Balikbaying = “Crazy buying”- you are buying things like crazy to fill up the rest of the box! Valentines outfits, ladies clothes, pink sunglasses, perfume, stiletto heels, and on and on.
    She sent pics of life on her farm, her mom, projects at the college, and in various clothing getups that I enjoyed. however, she never sent photos of her in things from the Balikbaying box. Later, I spoke to her professor, who said she was not a serious student. Then she did a video conversation with me, with several other snickering, hostile looking lady boys in the background. She revealed what she had really been spending her money on instead of college. A big rack of tits with too-small boy nipples! Turns out she had dropped out of University and paid for the knockers, not having the patience to wait for the hormones to grow her nips in first.
    I would have been proud to visit, date, and explore P___City with a young cute, androgynous hotel science student or graduate. Maybe she would get a job on a nice intra-PI cruise ship I could buy a ticket on.
    No way was I going to continue supporting a scammer. I could not even be sure which nice things we had talked about were true, and which were just made up. She sent several other messages, blaming me for everything, and tried to get me to talk to her on the phone. I am afraid to talk to her on the phone; she can be very convincing with her voice. I wish her the best, but since the future she is is building is based on lies, I doubt it.

    Johathan P. is a part time crossdresser. She sent a great hot photo of her alter ego, Joanne, on the back of a motorbike. I was suspicious of Laurence at the time, and asked her to spy on L. for me. Jonathan was also taking college classes to become a chef. I received many pictures of cooking projects he and his classmates did. One time, they fed an army unit for a weekend when they were there in P_____ City for training excercises and drills. He sent several pics of his alternate identity, Joanna. When he finally graduated, he sent graduation pics at my request. I could see a line of him and some friends in red robes and grad hats on a church pew-like bench, but nothing in the background to positively identify the location as being the university.
    After graduation, he never found a job as a chef. He tried and failed a couple of times to pass the teacher exam. Then he needed to pay for a work permit to work.
    If the PI really makes their citizens pay for work permits in order to do their jobs, that is outrageous!

    I think Johathan really did finish most of the chef program and I enjoyed sharing his exploits more than Laurence’s. I am not sure about graduation. After graduation, maybe he did get jobs, but was not motivated to tell me, so he could keep getting funds from me in addition to his job pay. Maybe he did get the teacher license, but ditto about notifying me. I wound down my support to Jonathan ( and spent way less than I did on Laurence, or Elmer abo-abo!

    So I have been way stupid supporting Pinay LBs, and I advise being very careful and suspicious.
    Nowadays, I am retired, and would love to go to the PI as soon as COVID is over.
    I now would like to go to Juchitan, Oaxaca Mexico, and see what is going on with the third-gender “Muxes” there. I am a white guy who is fluent in Spanish, but have wasted my time in the most conservative, Catholic part of Mexico!
    I think I would be better off where I speak the language. I only learned a few words in Visayan.
    I would like to go to the big annual Muxe party and see if I like it, or like “someone” :-).
    So you see, I still haven’t learned! I enjoyed getting to know my LBGFs, but probably would still have had a lot of fun if I had not sent any money.


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