I like ladyboys, am I gay?

My current girlfriend Anne is a Filipino ladyboy, we have been together for three years and we are now living together in Manila, Philippines. For all these years that we have been together, I never seen her as a guy nor consider her as a man. Although she has something extra special down there, I totally see her as a woman. It’s not that I am being biased because she is my girlfriend and I love her, but I totally see all transsexuals or ladyboys as women because they live their whole life as a women in spite of the fact that they are born as a man biologicaly. And they are happy of the life they choose because they believe in their heart, mind and soul that it makes them happy, and most importantly they have the heart to love a man like women do. As a matter of fact this is more than enough to consider transsexuals and ladyboys as female.

Am I Gay?

No, not at all. I don’t see myself as a a gay. I am quite open minded to begin with, and don’t really care what people say. All I know is I am happy with my ladyboy girlfriend. I love her as woman, I love her femininity, and not to brag, people can’t even tell that my girlfriend is a ladyboy because she is so naturally feminine. I don’t see any basis for people to call me gay; when you see us walking in the street, all you see is a regular (beautiful) couple, and you can’t even suspect a thing. Thus I am not gay.

I like ladyboys, am I gay?

I believe that this is still a common and unending question, which can possibly be one of the reasons that stops you from dating your dream girl. You can find various answers/opinions on the Internet but I believe that yourself alone can answer this simple question. You know yourself better than anyone else. But let me help you answer this. You are attracted to ladyboys or transsexuals because of their femininity. You admire them because they wear dresses, skirts, high heels, sexy shorts and they completely look like women, you can sometimes hardly even tell that they are TS because they live their life 24/7 as females. They aren’t men acting to be girls and you can’t categorise them as “cross-dressers” because it’s not what they are — psychology defines “cross-dressing” as a fetish where a guy uses or wears girl stuff for sexual pleasure. LB/Transsexuals are living their life as women  and you like them and get turned on with them because of their feminity, not because they look like dudes. They may still have their penises, but that is part of who they are and you need to accept them for having that because that makes ladyboys special. If you admire them for being feminine, technically you’re not gay and I firmly believe that you’re not. And this should not be the basis for you to identify your gender or sexual orientation. On the other hand, if you are not attracted to masculine features like hairs, muscles, beard etc., then you are not gay. So don’t let this question stop you from being happy.

I am living in the Philippines with my ladyboy girlfriend. A country where Roman Catholicism is the major religion, surrounded by many conservative people. But here I am living with my ladyboy girlfriend, living like a normal couple as man and woman. And I don’t care what other people say to me 🙂 all I know is that I am the happiest man on earth to have a ladyboy girlfriend like Anne.

French young man living in the Philippines with my ladyboy girlfriend. I wrote a book about my experience on dating trans women here https://howtodatealadyboy.com and I created the first decent dating site for trans women there https://myladyboydate.com

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15 thoughts on “I like ladyboys, am I gay?

  1. Thank you for that. That helps me a lot. Those were pretty much my thoughts exactly but its still good to hear them from someone else! i love ladyboys and only the ones that do indeed look like sexy and feminine women. And i have never felt bad (quite the opposite) when i am with one, yet occasionally when i’m sitting alone thinking about it the question does arise.

  2. Glad it helps 🙂 I believe many men might be questioning themselves about their attraction towards transsexual women, so here is the point of view of a man who fully assumes his special attraction.

  3. This is one of the most sensible things I have ever read about this subject. When I was first attracted to ladyboys I thought I must have turned gay. This feeling was reinforced by uninformed opinion on the web which always seems to think guys who like ladyboys must be gay. We are not, and once I realised this about myself I felt much happier about my desires. I fully agree with what you have written and much thanks for doing so. Haven’t met my soul mate yet, but feel a lot more comfortable about doing so now.

  4. thank you for your knowledge, i am about to enter into a relationship with a filipino ladyboy she is stunning and i have strong feelings for her. i hope it will last.

  5. hi .am angelsakii.transgender ( m-f) ladyboy from asia,,,
    and am proud to say anm ladyboy and looking for someone who interrested ,relationship with ladyboy/transgender

  6. Hello Simon,
    I have read some of your post & as much as you would like to think that you are correct & being sensitive, I am telling you that you are offensive on so many levels that you do not even know. That a side I am not much of a person for labels & social terminology but if you want to get technical.. Sex is associated with the anatomy of a person be it male or female, gender is a total different story. Now the question “Are You Gay?” has nothing to do with the transgender/transsexual person you are dating & all to do with you. Homosexuality is attraction to others of the same sex, be it that person feminine, bearded, likes to wear make-up, muscled, dresses like a “girl” acts like a “man” or whatnot. The question you should be posting is “Do you like Penis?” if yes then technically speaking you are gay or bisexual if breasts are involved (pun intended). If you are referring to being attracted to only transsexual females post-op then yes technically speaking you are heterosexual because you are attracted to a female but why would you then distinguish between a biological born female & a transsexual female. In the end who gives a flying truck, I do not know why being called gay hits a soft mark for a lot of men (well I do but let us not get into that), maybe one should ask themselves that question. Oh & isn’t your girlfriend part of the LGBT community.. Peace

    • Hi Aky, thanks for your comment, I greatly appreciate when it’s opening the debate like you do 🙂

      Yes I know the difference between gender, sex, sexual orientation, gender expression and the like. I’m pretty educated about it, but most men who are attracted to transwomen are not, and believe or not, “am I gay?” is a question that all of them are asking to themselves once.

      Just like you, I’m far from being a person for labels and terminologies and shit like this. What I’m trying to do, is giving some advice and information to people who need it, in the language that they understand. Men wouldn’t like to read the boring shit that trans organisations like to promote, this is just simply technical and boring to everybody but themselves.

      If I can get to the result that more people respect transwomen like they deserve to, then I believe the way I say it doesn’t matter, what matters is that I can reach out to the maximum of people and make them understand. In the same way, you can argue that calling my blog “My LADYBOY Girlfriend” is an offence, it’s only an offence to the people who want to feel offended. To the others who go beyond the title and read some of my articles, that’s bringing them good information and help, and that’s reaching a lot of transwomen in Asia who don’t know another terminology than this.

      My girlfriend is part of the LGBT 🙂

  7. Thankyou, allways thought that I was abit wierd perhaps gay, perhaps not ? ( but I don’t feel attracted to men in any way, even feminin males ). It boxes my head this to the point that I have even self harmed & tried to end my life. I have not yet attempted to follow my desires & would not know where/how to start.
    I realy feel happy for you & your partner, bless you both x

    • Wow this is extreme, and I’m glad that you got enough strength to get over it. You must feel alone, but you’re not! There is probably nobody in your relatives who can understand that you’re attracted to transsexual women, but you’re definitely not alone IN THIS WORLD.

      I can relate personally that I have never been so happy in my life since I started to openly live my attraction.

  8. This is an interesting article and a question that I was asking myself when I first started dating my current special girlfriend who I love very much.

    I examined this question from many different perspectives: physically, aesthetically, psychologically, genetically, endocrinologically. Looking in to what makes a man a man and a lady a lady. After careful thought I gave up on this as I was trying to force binary language to describe a a non binary concept. It just didn’t work to explain the various spectrums relating to identity, expression, sex and orientation.

    As such I shelved the analysis and just started enjoying the strong and fruitful relationship that i have. The labelling our sexuality/gender only seems an important topic of conversation amongst others now; this is a conversation that we chose not to engage in as we are too busy having fun together.

    I would rather be unconventionally happy than conventionally sad.

    • Hi Gibbon,

      That’s definitely the way to go. The way to get more men feel comfortable with their attraction, thus making trans women feel comfortable with themselves, and thus making society accept us all.

  9. I have never been with a man or ladyboy in Australia. I have never even felt the urge to. When I travel to Thailand I will go with both women and ladyboys. I don’t see it as being gay but just letting my hair down on holiday. I have read numerous books where men who act completely straight in their home countries have been with ladyboys. Some have even formed loving relationships which they often describe as better than they have had with a woman.
    Whether people say you are gay or bi doesn’t matter, it’s what you think that is important.

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