I believe this is a big question for every foreigner looking for true love in Asia. Is it all about your money, or is there something more? Of course I would not write this article if it was just about your money… But if it’s p4p girls that you are looking for, of course you will have no problems in finding them here in Philippines, and even more easily in Thailand!
But I prefer this article to talk about love and serious relationship, since I believe this is the key of true happiness. I want also to focus on Filipino ladyboys, since it’s the field that I know the best and I don’t want to bullshit you around with my half-knowledge about Thailand!
Important: please acknowledge beforehand that I am talking about my own western point of view and what I socially experienced here in the Philippines. I am not stupid enough to generalise that all Filipinos and all foreigners are like I describe in this article.
Foreigners are trendy
We have a different culture, that’s for sure. Why do we westerners like Asian girls? Because they are different from the girls we have in our home country, because they are exotic, and for many other reasons that make Asian girls attractive to us. It’s the same thing for the other way around. A foreigner in the Philippines will stand out of the crowd because he’s different. More white, usually taller, more extrovert, more “alpha male” maybe…
It’s the old adage that everything that is rare is valuable. Foreigners in the Philippines are a rare resource (just like Asian ladyboys are in US and Europe), so they are more fancied.
Foreigners can give true love and commitment
For the girls who are not gold diggers, this is the first reason why they prefer foreigners (let’s understand, westerners or men who have a western culture). Because there is one thing that you should know about Filipino men; even if they fantasise on transsexual women as much as we westerners do, they have a much lower tendency to like being in a serious relationship with a TS. I’ll repeat that Philippines is a Roman Catholic country, and their people are very strong believers and conservative people. Families might not accept easily that their son has a ladyboy girlfriend, and they also might feel a bit of inner guilt towards God?
Filipino ladyboys say that foreigners, on the other hand, are more open minded and likely to commit with a special girl, ready to introduce them to family and friends (I must admit it’s more easy when you have a very passable and beautiful Filipino ladyboy girlfriend!) and have a long term relationship.
Oh and there is also this behaviour that my friends reported sometimes, when a local Filipino man is going out with a ladyboy in order to financially depend on her. Money, cellphone loads, restaurants and drinks … that is the price if they want to have a local boyfriend!
But foreigners can also give more security and stability
The second reason why Filipino ladyboys would prefer having a foreign boyfriend is because of course they are more likely to ensure more financial security and stability in their relationship.
Philippines is a poor country, with a very big gap between the very poor and the very rich. Note that not all the ladyboys here are poor, far from that! You will find them in every layer of the society. And even the girls from rich family or the girls with a successful career will be as much likely to prefer hooking up with a foreigner! Indeed, they don’t really want to have a boyfriend who depends on them…
But there is also maybe this cultural difference that a proportion of Filipinos live day by day, without really planning anything long term. You know, that very laid back tendency that “if it can be done tomorrow, I’ll just do it next month”. I actually like that state of mind, it’s a so very pleasant attitude when I exit the busy Makati (central business district of Manila) for going to the province for relaxing. But I know that westerners have a different mindset regarding this. We are more concerned and afraid of the future, more stressed of the “what ifs”. When I was born, my mom already opened a savings account for me with 10 euros on it, and ever since I was taught how to be wise and practical. At 18 I met with my banker who was talking about short/medium/long term plans for the future… Society tells us that if we are not hardworking and if we don’t own our house by 40, we are losers. It’s in our culture, we are taught to follow a safe path, we are formatted for this. At least more than Filipinos are. And I believe it’s an inner trait that Filipino ladyboys are aware of and appreciate.
So, can a relationship with an Asian ladyboy work?
If there is one thing that I can assure you, it’s that nothing is never assured with love. I believe it can work, since I am myself living a long relationship with a Filipino ladyboy. But you must be wise, of course there is something wrong if you are 50 and your girlfriend is only 18 and lives in a slum. It can be win-win relationship (you get a young girlfriend, she gets financial support) but is it what you are looking for, or are you looking for something better, are you looking for true love?
Well, this is going beyond the topic of this article, so I’ll save my thoughts for another one I just hope that article will give you more enlightenment over the Asian (and more especially Filipino) culture and reasons why Filipino ladyboys are often looking for a foreign boyfriend. Comments and remarks are always very welcome!