Dos and Don’ts in sending money to your ladyboy girlfriend

My Filipino ladyboy girlfriend and I started with a long distance relationship. At the beginning, it was all virtual and all online, with some trips to Asia to be with her a couple of weeks in the year… And then I moved to the Philippines last year, and we are now living together and everything’s going well.

An aspect of that long distance relationship was about sending her gifts and showing her (and proving her) my love and seriousness. I believe it is very important because we can’t be physically together to normally show how we care for each other. So I usually sent her gifts for the special occasions like Christmas, birthday and Valentine’s day. In some cases, I send her little inexpensive gifts such as flowers, teddy bears and greeting cards without the need for a special occasion, just to show her my love and to surprise her.

I am glad to state now that it paid off, because I won her heart. The idea of sending her money instead of gifts also came along. Because with money, she can buy things that she likes or needs more than what I can think of buying her. Sending money to your ladyboy girlfriend (if she lives in third-world country like most of the countries in South East Asia: Philippines, Thailand, Malaysia, …) is a big issue actually, and you should think twice before doing it, as it requires your relationship to be already based on trust and honesty.

Why would you send money to your ladyboy girlfriend, in the first place?

Did I send money to my ladyboy girlfriend? Oh yes I did. I sent her money not because I am rich or to impress her. I sent money because I felt there is a need for me to do so. My girlfriend lives in the Philippines, which is a third-world country. Some research on Google will tell you that the average salary is around $200 a month, and that the number of people living in poverty is going beyond the highest heights. She was a student at that time, and she was dependent on her family who was not really supporting her effort to transition from boy to girl. Therefore she had of course issues in paying for her tuitions and for her “ladyboy expenses” at the same time, i.e HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy), girl clothes, make up and beauty products… This is mandatory for all ladyboys, and yeah, it costs more to be a ladyboy than to be a real girl!

I opted to send her some money to help her pay for her needs and for he transition. And that was rewarding for me too because I could see her blooming and becoming more and more beautiful, feminine and passable (she is totally passable actually). That also proved my love and trust to her, and I know she never spent the money for other things that what we agreed on.

Again, be careful and think twice, I have been lucky enough to be with a honest and genuine girl, but you have to be wise before sending money to your Asian ladyboy girlfriend, and here is a list of Dos and Don’ts for you to help you think and make the right decision.

Dos and Don’ts in sending money to your Ladyboy girlfriend

  1. Do send her money ONLY if it is important or urgent. Sending her money so that she can chill out at the mall, pay drinks to her friends or such… this is not what she should do with your money! Buying food, medicines, hormones, Internet bills… these are good reasons to use your money.
  2. Do ask her what is the money for, what is she going to do with it, investigate and if possible ask for proofs or receipts if applicable. But explain to her why you ask for proofs, that it’s to strengthen the trust between you and make your couple stronger. Asians have the tendency to think that westerners are all rich and have an unlimited amount of money in their bank account. She must understand that you are working hard to earn that money, and that you have no reason to give it to anybody unless you have deep feelings for her.
  3. Do always record the money that you send to her. Keep track of the date, the time and the amount. This way, you know how much you have invested and you know when to stop or to limit yourself.
  4. Do not send big amounts of money. Investigate first for the reality of the prices in the country of your girlfriend. Commodities are usually way cheaper than it is in US/Europe, don’t let her abuse you…
  5. Do not send her money every day every week  every month, send her only if needed. Actually, don’t send money on a regular basis, she shouldn’t feel that sending money to her is a normal thing. It is an exceptional thing.
  6. Do not send gifts and money both at the same time. Sending money IS a gift.
  7. Do not tolerate her if she keeps on asking for money, learn to say no. And let her understand why you can’t. That even if you come from a richer country, money is not growing in your garden… Explain it in a nice way though.
  8. Do not make her feel that you have a lot money, so she will not love you because of your money alone. That’s the worst thing that could happen to you. Besides the money, there are plenty of others things that Asians appreciate in Westerners, believe me.

French young man living in the Philippines with my ladyboy girlfriend. I wrote a book about my experience on dating transwomen here http://howtodatealadyboy.com and I created the first decent dating site for transwomen there http://myladyboydate.com

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21 thoughts on “Dos and Don’ts in sending money to your ladyboy girlfriend

  1. Great site and great post. I had a 2 year ‘virtual’ relationship with a Filipino ladyboy and share many of the experiences you talk about.
    We met on an adult site but we just ‘connected’. We grew really close but after 6 months she got fired and when she asked for some help I happily sent money. She couldn’t get work, struggled to pay the rent and eventually moved out of the city (where all her friends lived). I sent money when I could but it was never enough really.
    Our relationship threw up many issues- I had never used a webcam before for a start, certainly never had webcam sex and never had anyone with a dick say they love me before. But short of going out there to live, I could not change things. As you say, it’s about finding the right balance. Unfortunately, I couldn’t.

  2. Thanks Andy, looks like a typical story, what you had. I had been luckier than you though, as I could manage to move to the Philippines for good!

    Wish the best for you in the future, don’t give up the idea to get a Filipino ladyboy girlfriend, it can really work.

    • Indeed, I didn’t have the luck, and so I’m left wondering what could have been. Although this was my first experience with a Filipino ladyboy and it didn’t work out, I take many positives from it. And I’ve gone some way to deal with issues it threw up. Confronting my sexual desires, I’ve now slept with three ladyboys (which has oppened up another world) and I’m definately a happier person for it. And who knows with life (as you so rightly say) maybe one day I’ll find something more!

    • Good thing :) You’re part of the guys that assume their sexual attraction for ladyboys, not all the men are brave enough to make the step.

      What country are you from?

    • Hello Simon,

      I am so glad I found your site!! So much help into finding out if my Filipino girlfriend is real and possibly could have a long term relationship!! I’ve always dreamed of it just like you. I’d love to email you about my situation here and tell me what you think of it. I would really like to here someone else’s say about our relationship. Please please reply back

      Thanks, again Simon.

  3. I live in the UK and in London there’s a growing ladyboy community, from the Philippines, Thailand, Singapore, Malaysia and even Japan. The ladyboys I have been with were beautiful, sexy, very charming but all down to earth. Initially it felt like a big step to take, and I agree with you that it takes courage. But as this website shows, it is a step well worth taking.

  4. Totally true. I had my first Filipino *ladyboy* girlfriend while living in London years ago. I appreciate how the people in this city are so much more open minded compared to the French people (where I come from), which makes London a welcoming city for LGBT people.

    If you have the opportunity, you should definitely visit Philippines and Thailand though, you’d be shocked by the percentage of population being gay and/or transsexual in there, nothing that a westerner could imagine ;-)

  5. Andy, it`s so hard to find a guy like you, I can compare myself to your ladyboy girlfriend because I`m stil studying and i`m in a transition intaking horomone replace therapy.Your ladyboy girlfriend is surely grateful to have you in your life and as do you.
    actually I`m 18 yrs old, and I`m really looking for a guy similarly like you, how I wish I could a similarly like you. I hope you and your ladyboy girlfriend will have a long lasting relationship with the blessing of God. Any advices and tips to have a Loyal and Loving guy towards a true relationship with me? I`ll take the risks if in the beginning it`ll start with a long distant relationship.

    • by the way Andy,one of my words there was really misspelled, I type too fast,hehe. anyways I really want to get advices from you to have a true boyfriend that will love me even though I`m a Ladyboy, i`ve got lots of complicated problems,not only financially but emotionally. I want also to add you in my facebook friends because I really want to keep in touch with you in terms of the advices and tips that you will give to find and to have a relationship with a guy… thank you so much! I`ll be looking forward to your responses Andy. God bless you!

    • Hey guys, if you go to the fan page of the blog http://www.facebook.com/MyLadyboyGirlfriend you will find each other if you wanna chat ;-) (so you don’t have to publicly post your email address, better for privacy concerns!)

      Gabrielle, where are you from? 18 years old, you are still young, don’t worry, there are plenty of men who like ladyboys and want to be serious, they just need to find the way (and I am trying with this blog to show the way, by the example of my personal life, that I believe is worth sharing and will hopefully help the cause of the LGBT in the Philippines at least!)

  6. I checked out the Facebook page but I’m not a member so I can’t connect to the fan page (still, the pictures look interesting – a long way from the streets of London…..and the beaches of France!). Hi Gabrielle, it would be nice to talk to you so if we can find a way to connect then we definitely should. You are having difficult times and I would be happy to give any advice I can. And thank you very much for the kind words. Be strong.

    • Ahah yeah no comparison with London or France!

      I’ll forward your email to Gabrielle ;-)

  7. Andy,I do live in the Philippines. hmm, it`s really true that I`m going to have a hard time connecting with you but at least email or chat will do so that I`m able to know your advice. I`m really looking forward and endlessly wishing that there will be a guy who really love me, I really need someone to lend on, I`ve been searching and waiting for so long, But still I`m staying strong so that I`ll have a bright future and to meet the guy who will really love me…anyways, so much for the emotional scene, here`s my YM Andy,maybe you could just leave your messages on my chat or email box. Wishing you all the best, may you and your ladyboy girlfriend will have a long lasting relationship and God bless you!

  8. Oh Simon,I do live in the Philippines, thank you so much for the positivity and courage that you gave me,don`t worry I`ll stay strong, I know my efforts and patience will lead me to the guy that I`m really looking for, I`m really having a hard time with my life problems… I really need someone to lend on…. I`ve been waiting and searching for so long,
    well,while waiting and searching I`ll just stay strong,live and learn. Thanks alot SImon.:)

  9. Just wish to find someone real for long tern relationship, as my friend Simon suggested his blog which he said might help so we shall see what life, time and destiny will bring me this time.

  10. Ive been having a love affair with a Filipina TS for 4 years, online. I live in france.

    She was immediately different from some others as she never asked for money and had a job. I fell in love and sent her Cds and flowers. then when things got difficult for her i sent small amounts to help. I even bought and sent her a laptop. i must have sent her more than 3000$ by now, sometimes 200$ per month. ive paid for clothes, hairstyling, even 1 time when she moved house.

    Never once have i seen her naked. we just chat IM or talk by phone.

    Recently we have broken up cos i refused to pay for some medical bills, even though she knows im saving for her op.

    By the way im divorced with 3 kids and 45, my tgirl is 27.
    I know thiis sounds like gold digging but for firstt 2 years she never asked me for money. we were even posted as Engaged on FB for the last year.

    i miss her a lot. am i wrong to quit her?

    • To be honest with you, I believe you were right to quit her. I believed you’ve been engaged and involved too much into her personal problems. I understand that you did this because you loved her so much, but I also believe there is a limit to not go beyond. And yes the story looks like gold digging…

      Besides, why have you not travelled to the Philippines also to meet her in 4 years?

  11. I’m sorry to hear that you got ripped off Manny but this is the case for vast majority of pinay ladyboys. They hate westerners and they just want their money. They are gorgeous on the outside but rotten on the inside. They are excellent at sweet talking and pretending to be interested in a guy but they have nothing in common with you and probably laugh behind your back if you fall for their trap and cough up money. They can groom multiple guys over long periods of time and make more money than the average doctor by ripping off lonely guys. You should either travel to the Philippines or look for a transwoman in your home country. Good luck in finding a girlfriend.

    • I would actually disagree with this statement. Filipino ladyboy scammers only make shadow to the big part of genuine Filipino ladyboys because they make big efforts in being visible.

      It’s part of their job to go online and “hunt” for potential suckers. So when a foreign guy is searching for a Filipino ladyboy partner, of course the first results are scammers…

      Of course, my opinion is the opinion of an insider, because I live in Philippines. And I got scammed in in the past and I met a bunch of scammers or other opportunists. It’s almost part of the game, I would say.

  12. Hi Simon, Love the info you have out there. Seems to me no matter who you “connect with” they are going to ask you for money. Why not? I think it’s at the very least “testing you” for a little generosity. After all I think the life of a ladyboy anywhere can be difficult nevermind in a third world country. You just have to be smart and be ready. If it becomes excessive. then just walk.

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